It wasn’t my child. But I was the adult who saw it.

The other day, Gabriel was playing quietly when another child came over. At first, nothing unusual: two children around the same toys, a few disagreements, a little negotiation in their own way.

Then the other child started pushing him. I waited for a few seconds. Maybe their parent would step in, maybe Gabriel would move away, maybe it would sort itself out.

Then the child tried to hit him.

I walked over and said, “I won’t let you hit him.”

Straight afterwards, I had that tiny hesitation: this was not my child. Not because I wanted to lecture him or teach him anything, but because we sometimes feel that it is the other parent’s job to intervene.

Except perhaps the parent simply had not seen. They might have looked away for a few seconds. With children moving everywhere, that happens very easily.

And meanwhile, I had seen.

Maybe that was the little bug: waiting for the other parent to step in even though I am already there and I have seen what is happening.

That does not mean intervening in every disagreement. Two children can argue over a toy, protest, negotiate or try to find a solution without an adult immediately arriving. But when somebody could get hurt, I do not necessarily need to wait until the other parent has seen the scene too.

Not because the other child is “bad”, or because their parent is doing something wrong. And not because it is my job to raise that child. Simply because I saw a boundary being crossed.

In those moments, there is no need for a speech. I can simply say:

And if words are not enough, I can gently stop the action.

Sometimes being the adult who saw is enough reason to step in.